


i was your favorite

by unrestraynedrevolution



Category: EXO
Genre: Angst, M/M, bawal umiyak, blame taylor swift her new album made me write this, dapat kasi pag friends friends lang, friends to lovers sana, kyungsoo baby im sorry love u
Language: Filipino
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:15:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25568860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unrestraynedrevolution/pseuds/unrestraynedrevolution
Summary: siguro tama nga si taylor swift—tayo ang pinipili kasi tayo lang yung nand'yan.
Relationships: Park Chanyeol/Byun Baekhyun, Park Chanyeol/Do kyungsoo
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	i was your favorite

Pagdilat ng mga mata ni Kyungsoo, ang liwanag na ng kwarto niya. Ang ganda ng tama ng sunrays sa dingding ng cream-colored room niya na pwede nang pang-instagram story at may caption na “good morning, lazy day” with a sun and sleeping emoji. He groaned at humilata sa kama from his nakadapang position para namnamin ang lambot at very welcoming feeling ng kanyang kama at 7AM in the morning.

Ugh. _Sarap_.

_Teka... 7AM... 7AM na?_

“Putangina!” Ang unang lumabas sa bibig ni Kyungsoo sa relaxing morning na iyon. “First subject ko major ko ngayon!”

He jolted awake from his relaxed mood from his malambot na bed at grabe ang adrenaline rush na parang may sunog sa kanila. Legit sobrang bilis ng pagkatayo ni Kyungsoo dahil medyo nag-swirl ang paligid ng konti. Agad siyang lumabas ng kwarto, patakbo sa lababo at naghilamos.

“Good morning, Nak. Sarap tulog mo ah,” Bati ng mama niyang prenteng nakaupo sa white malabot sofa nila at nagsi-sip pa ng tsaa while reading the newspaper. Sinamaan siya ni Kyungsoo ng tingin habang naglalagay ng toothpaste sa toothbrush.

“Ma naman eh,” Dejected na sabi ni Kyungsoo. “Baht dwi mwo ko ginishing!”

Tinaasan siya ng kilay ng mama niya. Nagmumog si Kyungsoo at naghilamos ulit para fully mahimasmasan.

“Aba, Kyungsoo Do. College ka na, sa ‘kin ka pa umaasang magpagising? Tapos balak mo pang mag-dorm.”

Kunot-noo lang si Kyungsoo na bumalik sa kwarto niya at mabilisang nagbihis sabay kuha ng bag. Puyat kasi siya kagabi kakakabisado ng lines nila para sa isang presentation na gaganapin sa first subject din nila. Nagdasal pa siya sa lahat ng santong kilala niya—na tatlo lang naman ata, to be honest, hindi pa siya sure—na _please po sana smooth ang performance ko bukas pagbigyan n’yo na po ako sa uno magiging mabait na po akong anak._

“Alis na ‘ko, Ma!” Half sigaw ni Kyungsoo at patakbong lumabas sa bahay nila habang hawak ang dalawang slice ng wheat bread. Mukha siyang si Sailor Moon sa first episode nung anime na nagmamadaling pumasok dahil late rin. Baka in another universe, anime character talaga si Kyungsoo.

Ang boring at generic naman magsulat ng author ng manga series niya kung ganon.

Dalawang kanto ang layo ng sakayan ng jeep mula sa bahay nila at thank you sa katawan ni Kyungsoo dahil sa dami ng adrenaline. Kasalukuyan niyang dinamdam ang malamig na 7:15AM wind rushing past him as he runs for his life and his uno sa major subject.

May malapit na playground sa sakayan ng jeep at pag-pauwi, nags-stay saglit si Kyungsoo roon para magmuni-muni at itanong kay Lord bakit ba siya nag-take ng Theater Arts. Kapag maagang nakakaalis sa bahay papasok, dumadaan din siya roon para kausapin ang langit at tanungin ang tadhana kung _kaya ko ba talaga today, Lord, kahit dalawang oras lang ang tulog ko?_

Syempre hindi niya magagawa ang kanyang little self-transcendence session sa playground dahil nga late na siya. Nag-decide na lang si Kyungsoo na magdasal internally habang tumatakbo _. Lord, all things are possible with you sabi nila, kaya please po kahit today lang—yung isang oras na byahe ko papasok pagkasyahin mo sa 15 minutes. Lord, please._

Konti na lang... ayun na yung pila ng jeep at yung jeep. Makakasakay na siya, one step closer sa unibersidad na pinag-aaralan niya. Kung bakit sa malayo-layo pa siya kasi nag-aral, hindi niya rin alam. _Bahala ka, Kyungsoo, kasalanan mo rin ‘yan._

Konti na lang... konting takbo na lang at...

Ayun ang pangalawang _putangina_ ni Kyungsoo dahil sa kamalas-malasan naman talaga, sa lahat ng araw na pwede siyang parusahan ng mga santo, diwata, at Lord God himself, ngayon pa talagang late na siya sa major subject niya. Nadapa si Kyungsoo, right there sa kanto ng favorite munimuni spot niya aka the playground. _Sino ba kasing naglagay ng bato rito!?_

Parang ayaw niya na lang bumangon, a very big bahala na situation. _Hindi na ako papalag, Destiny at Kismet. Tanggap ko nang hanggang dos lang ako sa major. Kahit masakit, tanggap ko na._

“Uy, ‘wag kang matulog d’yan,” A voice called out kay Kyungsoo na nakasalampak pa sa sahig at paiyak na. “Here, tulungan kita.”

He looked up at _puta, kasilaw naman_ dahil ang tangkad nung lalaki at right behind him was the sun rays. He grabbed the hand at unti-unting tumayo. Pinagpagan niya ang pants at tshirt niya in hopes na sana medyo presentable pa siya pagdating sa classroom nila. The guy who helped him is still standing in front of him kaya naman pinansin na siya ni Kyungsoo.

“Thank you,” Sambit niya at unexpectedly namula dahil ang gwapo pala nung tumulong sa kanya. Baka nga isa siyang slice of life anime protagonist in another universe.

“Wala ‘yun,” The tall guy smiled at mas lalo atang nasilaw si Kyungsoo. There can be only one sun, diba! Bakit nag-eexist ‘to?! “Chanyeol pala.”

Hala, nagpakilala pa nga. “Kyungsoo.”

They shook hands at napansin naman ni Kyungsoo ang oras sa wristwatch niya—7:20AM. Walang oras para humarot kaya nag-smile na lang siya at nagsimula ulit tumakbo kahit medyo iika-ika. _Pogi ka, kuya, pero late na ako sa major ko._

—

Free cut na ni Kyungsoo at saan pa ba better i-spend ang free cut kundi sa lugar na puro pagkain. Kasama niya si Junmyeon ngayon, ang kanyang best friend since high school na kung ‘di lang straight ay pwede nang maging soulmate niya. Parehas sila ng major, parehas nagpapa-alipin para sa uno, at halos parehas ng height—ang kaibahan lang, never na-late si Jun sa tanang buhay niya. Sana all.

“At least naka 20/25 ka,” Jun said, habang nginunguya ang jelly from his schlurp. Yayamanin si Jun, thrice a week siyang may 78 peso drink from 7/11 just because he can. “Kung hindi ka late, perfect sana.”

Kyungsoo sighed habang nilalaro ang taho niya gamit ang straw. “Naiinis ako. Nasisi ko pa si Mama kanina na hindi ako ginising eh kasalanan ko rin namang hindi ako nag-set ng alarm.”

“Oh diba, alam mo rin na you caused your own misery.”

“Bwiset,” Kyungsoo stood up at inubos ang remaining 10 peso taho niya. “Bili lang akong egg pie. D’yan ka lang.”

Junmyeon laughs,”Ayan, mag-stress eating ka!”

Kyungsoo raised his middle finger at naglakad na papunta sa isang stall.

Ang pinakaayaw ni Kyungsoo tuwing free cut niya ay ang daming tao. Parang sinadya ng university nila na more than half ng student body ay may free cut from 2PM to 4PM. That, or may balat lang si Kyungsoo sa pwet. Last time he checked, wala naman.

“Ate, isa nitong egg pie at yu—puta!”

Bakit ba parang galit ang mundo kay Kyungsoo today? Kung kailan wala siyang dalang extrang shirt, tsaka naman may nakatapon sa kanya ng malamig na tubig. Thank you na lang dahil hindi boiling water ‘yon?

“Hala, sorry!” The person who spilled water on him said, halata ang concern sa voice. “Teka—eto, panyo. Sorry.”

Kyungsoo snatched the handkerchief at kunot-noong pinunasan ang braso niya. “Ang tanga naman kasi eh!”

“Uy, grabe ka naman,” The person spoke again. _Bakit parang familiar?_ “Accident ‘yun!”

“Accident mo mukha m—teka, ikaw yung kanina!” Kyungsoo said, surprised. Naduro niya pa si Kuyang Pogi na tumulong sa kanya nung nadapa siya earlier.

The guy has the kunot-noo look as if nababaliw si Kyungsoo in front of him pero parang may lightbulb bigla on the top of his head at naalala niya kung sino ang kaharap niya. “Kyung—Kyoong—?”

“Kyungsoo,” Sagot niya. The taller guy nodded naman at ngumiti pa.

“Right, Chanyeol nga pala, if you can’t remember.”

“Ah, oo. Sorry kung nasungitan kita ha,” Kyungsoo mustered his best apologetic face. “Stressed lang.”

“No, that was an accident pero parang mas kasalanan ko since I wasn’t looking saan ako papunta.” Ay, ‘di ka sure? “May extra shirt ako sa locker, gusto mong humiram?”

Tatanggi sana si Kyungsoo pero may dalawang class pa siya at air conditioned ang classrooms nila. Mamamatay siya sa lamig kung uunahin niyang magfeeling dalagang Pilipina.

Kyungsoo agreed at sumama siya kay Chanyeol sa locker nito. He told him na lalaban niya muna yung panyo ni Chanyeol bago ibigay pabalik but Chanyeol said ‘wag na kasi tubig lang naman, it’s nothing at hindi naman mapilit si Kyungsoo. They left with the promise na magkita na lang ulit the next next day dahil apparently parehas sila ng oras ng free cut tuwing Wednesday.

Kyungsoo returned to Jun na hindi pa rin ubos ang schlurp nito.

“Wow, outfit change?” Jun asked. “Kaninong shirt ‘yan, ngayon ko lang nakita sa ‘yo.”

“Hiniram ko lang,” Kyungsoo answered as he bit from his egg pie na binayaran din ni Chanyeol kanina. “Babalik ko rin.”

—

What are the odds talaga na kung sino ang nakakita sa isa out of all the thousand embarrassing moments Kyungsoo has ay kaparehas niya ng university na pinag-aaralan?

He asked Chanyeol, as if ‘di siya makapaniwala dahil hindi naman nag-click the first time they met sa loob ng school, kung doon ba siya nag-aaral. Ano bang malay ni Kyungsoo, ‘di ba, baka napadaan lang or siya ang designated savior niya na nilaan ng Kalangitan for him.

Chanyeol said yes at taga-BS Interior Design pala siya. Medyo far from Kyungsoo’s building pero ‘pag gusto, maraming paraan like they said in that one famous OPM song.

After he returned the shirt to Chanyeol, niyaya siya nito to hangout for a while kasi nga free cut nila and the taller reasoned din na he had no kne to go with him. Kyungsoo rejected at first kasi hindi naman siya kaladkaring tao but Chanyeol promised na ililibre siya.

At sino ba siya, isang middle class na nagpumilit mag-aral in a private institution, para tumanggi sa libre? So syempre, sumama siya.

That first hangout led to many more—turns out, isang araw lang hindi tugma ang free cut nila. Almost same na nga sila ng schedule eh, pwede na silang maghiraman ng time table. Minsan, nagpapang-abot sila papasok so sabay sila at ganun din pauwi.

“Close na close na kayo nung Chanyeol, ah,” Jun said habang binubuksan ang schlurp niya. “‘Di ka na madalas sumama sa ‘kin.”

“Wow, as if naman kailangan mo ‘ko eh kasama mo lagi girlfriend mo,” Kyungsoo said and rolled his eyes. “Gagawin n’yo pa akong third wheel n’yo ni Joohyun eh.”

“Reklamador, nililibre naman kita kapag third wheel ka,” Jun retorted back. “Crush mo ‘yung Chanyeol, ‘no?”

Para namang nabilaukan si Kyungsoo sa pearl milktea niya. “Huy, gago ka ba?”

“Ano nga?”

“Hindi!” Kyungsoo said, medyo loud than he intended. “Kaibigan ko lang ‘yon.”

“Wow, Mr. Congeniality ka na pala ngayon,” Jun said and laughed a bit. “Buti hindi nasusungitan sa ‘yo.”

“Ewan ko ron, hindi tinatablan ng kasungitan. Napakakulit at kapal ng mukha, parang siya yung taga-BA Theater sa ‘ming dalawa eh.”

“Oh, speaking of. Palapit na rito.”

Napatingin naman si Kyungsoo sa likuran niya and there he saw the ever so pogi Chanyeol Park na nakangiti at kumakaway pa. Parang kandidato lang tuwing elections.

“Una na ‘ko,” Paalam ni Kyungsoo at inayos na ang gamit niyang nakakalat sa table.

“Enjoy sa date!” Pang-asar ni Jun at nag-smirk.

“Gago ka, Junmyeon.”

He approached Chanyeol at agad naman nitong ni-ruffle ang buhok niya. Kyungsoo hated whenever people do that dahil ang dumi ng kamay tapos ipapahid sa buhok niya!? Manners naman sana.

But for some reason, Chanyeol’s hand feels warm kaya hinahayaan niya lang ito na gawin ‘yun. Kyungsoo is a straightforward person kaya hindi niya rin idedeny na when Chanyeol does that, may feeling of kilig talaga.

Maiiwasan ba ‘yun when Chanyeol smiles down at him, ruffles his hair, tapos aakbayan siya, pulling him closer to his body na halos ma-engulf na si Kyungsoo?

He might look cold-hearted and snobbish on the outside pero tao pa rin naman si Kyungsoo—may feelings at minsan, parang manipis na kahoy. Marupok.

Deep in his kilig thoughts habang naglalakad, hindi napansin ni Kyungsoo ang hump sa daan kaya suprise but not really surprise, natalisod siya. He braced himself bago mahalikan ang cold hard cement ng kanilang campus when a strong arm wrapped around his abdomen.

Para siyang baby na madaling buhatin.

“Alam mo, I’m starting to think na may pagka-tanga ka talaga ‘pag naglalakad o tumatakbo,” Chanyeol commented while he helps Kyungsoo to his feet. “Okay ka lang?”

“Leche naman kasi, bakit may humps diyan,” Kyungsoo irritatingly said. “Dapat may warning eh.”

“Funny ka,” Chanyeol said at inakbayan na naman siya ulit. It felt funny kasi Kyungsoo never experienced the butterflies in your stomach thing kahit medyo marami na rin siyang nakalandian dati. Pero kay Chanyeol, para siyang kinikiliti... parang pinipilit siyang ngumiti o tumawa.

“Tulala ka na naman,” Chanyeol’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts. “Gutom ka pa ba? Libre kita.”

“Gusto ko ‘yan,” _At ikaw rin, charot_. “Tara na.”

It’s a new feeling—hindi naman ganito dati kapag may nagugustuhan siya. Nakakatakot pero at the same time, masaya, almost overwhelming. Hindi sigurado si Kyungsoo kung crush niya na talaga ‘tong matangkad na may malaking tenga at magandang smile pero he knows that this kilig isn’t something so simple.

—

“Kala ko hangout, bakit ang daming art materials dito?” Kyungsoo asked, settling down his bag and notes sa table. Nasa Starbucks sila ngayon, as per Chanyeol’s request and libre, at tatlong round table ata ‘tong pinagdugtong-dugtong ni Chanyeol.

Busy ito magdrawing and did not even look up kay Kyungsoo when he arrived. Hinawi ni Chanyeol ang artmats at inabot ang java chip frappe sa kanya. Kyungsoo peeked at what he was coloring at bakit sobrang focused nito. Procrastinating? Malapit na deadline, nakalimutan gawin?

“Para saan ‘yan?” Kyungsoo asked while staring at the drawing. Ganda, pwede bang tumira na lang ako sa drawing?

“Plates ng kaklase ko,” Chanyeol answered nonchalantly.

“Huh? Ba’t ikaw gumagawa? Babayaran ka n’yan? Naks, negosyo ah.”

“Hindi,” Chanyeol sighed and stopped coloring to sip his drink. “Tinutulungan ko lang. Mangiyak-ngiyak na kanina sa klase dahil ‘di pa siya nangangalahati sa plates tapos kulang pa sa tulog.”

Kyungsoo nodded and sat down. “Bait naman. Tapusin mo nga rin ‘tong script ko.”

“Loko, wala akong alam d’yan. Bumagsak ka pa,” Chanyeol smirked and went back sa pagkukulay.

Tahimik lang silang dalawa for the next two hours with Chanyeol finishing his classmate’s plates and Kyungsoo writing his script. The latter heard an exhausted groan at doon lang siya naglook up from his laptop. He saw Chanyeol with his eyes closed, iniikot-ikot ang wrists para ma-stretch.

“Tapos ka na?” Chanyeol asked kay Kyungsoo and grabbed his almost empty venti-sized drink.

“Malapit na. Ikaw?”

“Tapos na sa wakas,” Chanyeol raised his fists pa in the air. “Lakas ko talaga.”

Kyungsoo just nodded in acknowledgement and went back to typing at his laptop. Chanyeol stood up at nagpaalam na magc-cr lang to which Kyungsoo just nodded lang din.

Chanyeol returned with another batch of drinks at dalawang cinnamon roll after 15 minutes. Kyungsoo’s finished na rin sa script niya kaya he shut down his laptop at nag-start kainin ang cinnamon roll.

“Kyungsoo, alam mo ba...” Chanyeol spoke habang nakatingin out the transparent walls of SB. “May crush ako.”

Kyungsoo immediately stopped eating at napatingin kay Chanyeol na nakatingin na rin pala sa kanya. Biglang sobrang lakas ng kabog ng puso ni Kyungsoo at feeling niya masusuka siya dahil sa kaba. Nevertheless, he managed to mask his internal panic with a composed, relaxed face. Advantage ng course niya ‘to, he’s such a great actor.

“Talaga?” He asked, pretending to be curious kahit parang ayaw niya talagang malaman. “Sino?”

Chanyeol stared at him for like five seconds bago ngumiti. Parang gusto naman matunaw ni Kyungsoo.

“Secret muna.”

Sabay na umuwi sina Chanyeol at Kyungsoo dahil parehas naman ang way nila. Naghiwalay sila sa may playground at nang masigurado ni Kyungsoo na malayo na si Chanyeol, tsaka na niya nilabas ang overwhelming emotions na tinatago niya kanina pa.

Ngiting-ngiti siyang naglakad pauwi dahil sa kilig. _Lord, ito pala ang kapalit ng unong hindi ko makukuha. Salamat po._

Kyungsoo strongly feels na siya ‘yun—siya ‘yung crush ni Chanyeol. Hindi naman ‘to pure delusion dahil may basis siya! Lagi silang magkasama, lagi siyang nginingitian ni Chanyeol, laging nagk-kwento sa kanya, madalas siyang sinasabayan papasok at pauwi, at bukod sa lahat ay nililibre siya lagi. For Kyungsoo, those are more than enough as proof na crush din siya ng crush niya.

So Kyungsoo allows himself to fall, deeper than before—just because of a simple uncertainty he’s fooling himself with.

—

“Kyungsoo, si Baekhyun nga pala,” Chanyeol introduces the short guy beside him, his arm around sa waist nito. “ _Boyfriend ko_.”

_Huh?_

“Uy, Kyungsoo? Buhay ka pa ba? Nakatulala ka na naman.”

It’s been more than a month since their Starbucks hangout na naging gawaan lang din naman ng plates at script. It’s been more than a month when Chanyeol told him na may crush siya at it’s been more than a month since he believed na siya ‘yon.

_Siguro clown na lang ang role ko sa next play na ip-present sa class._

“C-Congrats,” Kyungsoo said, cursing himself inwardly dahil sa pag-shake ng voice. “Kailan pa?”

“Last week lang,” The Baekhyun guy answered and smiled warmly sa kanya. “Baekhyun Byun pala.”

He nodded and shook Baekhyun’s hand. “Kyungsoo.”

“Madalas kang makwento ni Chanyeol sa ‘kin! Ikaw raw best friend niya.”

_Ah, best friend._

“Talaga?” Kyungsoo asked and looked at Chanyeol na nakangiti. “Madalas kayong magkasama?”

“Kaklase ko si Baekhyun,” Chanyeol answered at inakbayan ang boyfriend niya. “Sa kanya ‘yung plates na ginawa ko last time. Iiyak na kasi.”

Baekhyun turned to Chanyeol and pouted. Chanyeol pinched his nose naman in return.

_Really? In front of me? Ang bastos naman._

Kyungsoo smiled and gathered his things. “Uy, nice meeting you, Baekhyun. Congrats sa inyo, ah! I’d love to spend more time with you both kaso I remember may tatapusin pa ‘kong paper with my partner for the next subject eh. Una na ‘ko, ha?”

Baekhyun’s face turned sad, parang ayaw niyang umalis pa si Kyungsoo. “Hala, sayang naman. Pero sige, hangout with you next time, Soo!”

Kyungsoo nodded kay Chanyeol at nag-wave ng hands kay Baekhyun. He smiled at them, thanking the gods that he took BA Theater Arts dahil ang galing niya na talagang umacting.

As soon as he got out of the café, tears immediately fell from his eyes. He texted Junmyeon to meet him para ibigay ang paper niya na is-submit sa next class. He can’t stay at school any longer. He wants to go home and just drown in his thoughts at his bed.

Hindi nag-dinner si Kyungsoo at ang lunch niya lang kanina ay ‘yung venti sized java chip frappe na nilibre ni Chanyeol sa kanya, na hindi niya rin naman nakalahati. But he’s not hungry, just tired. Very pagod to the point he doesn’t feel like getting up from his bed anymore at ayaw niya na ring pumasok kinabukasan.

Kyungsoo wondered how it happened: siya ‘yung kasabay papasok at pauwi, siya ‘yung kasama tuwing free cut, siya ‘yung kasamang gumawa ng requirements, at siya ‘yung pinagve-vent out-an kapag stressed na sa klase. They were almost inseparable.

Siya ‘yung laging nand’yan, pero bakit biglang may Baekhyun?

He didn’t see that coming—walang ganun sa storyline at sa script na alam niya. All he knew was that this was a friends to lovers story and he and Chanyeol were the protagonists. He imagined the scenes already and they all felt real and fitting.

Pero what happened? Bakit hindi siya yung pinili?

Or maybe pinili talaga siya ni Chanyeol, just not the way he expected it to be.

Feeling ni Kyungsoo, napag-practisan siya ni Chanyeol—nililibre, sinasabayan papasok, hinahatid pauwi, sinasamahang gumawa ng requirements. He felt like pinili siyang dummy ni Chanyeol; testing kung paano ba, gagana ba, ganito ba.

And he felt like shit dahil he knew hindi naman ganun. Chanyeol wasn’t like that, Chanyeol wouldn’t think that. All he offered was a real friendship and Kyungsoo was the one who messed it all up thinking it was more than that.

Kyungsoo’s mind was running so fast— _all thoughts head full_ , ganon. Ang dami niyang naiisip. Napapagod siya lalo and he wanted to rest but sleep wouldn’t come. Paulit-ulit niya nang pinagagalitan ang sarili niya dahil alam niyang kasalanan niya lahat.

Pero is it right to only blame himself? Parang hindi naman. If anyone else saw how Chanyeol’s eyes twinkle whenever he looks at Kyungsoo, the way he laughs kapag may sarcastic comeback si Kyungsoo sa kanya, and the way he smiles kapag nakikita niyang tuwang-tuwa si Kyungsoo sa kinakain niya.

Kyungsoo noticed all that and that was his basis to conclude na siya yung gusto ni Chanyeol.

Pero baka kasi siya lang ‘yung nand’yan kaya sa kanya ginagawa yun. Siya lang ‘yung palaging nand’yan, through thick or thin, rain or shine, kaya siya ‘yung pinipili.

Siya ‘yung pinipili ni Chanyeol dati kahit he can hangout with his friends sa Arki at CivEngg. Siya ‘yung sinasamahan ni Chanyeol sa library kahit may study group naman na ang blockmates nito. Siya ‘yung nililibre ni Chanyeol kahit gustong-gusto magpalibre ng mga kaklase nito.

Siya ‘yung pinipili at nasanay siya roon. Nasanay siyang siya lang ang _best_ choice ni Chanyeol.

But it’s really not that, isn’t it? It’s the fact that he let himself be _used_ by Chanyeol thinking that things are better that way dahil at least ay may lugar siya sa buhay nito. Nilason ni Kyungsoo ang sarili niya by thinking that he was Chanyeol’s favorite but in reality, wala lang talaga siyang better choice.

That is, until Baekhyun came into the picture.

Kyungsoo is tired. He expected for something and it ended up disappointing himself tragically. Lalayo muna siya kay Chanyeol—it’s just a bandaid over a broken glass but it’s better than nothing.

—

Two weeks nang ilag na ilag si Kyungsoo kay Chanyeol and the latter was getting extremely worried. He caught the smaller once and tried to invite him to hangout dahil hindi available si Baekhyun at the time, but Kyungsoo rejected him and told him he’s busy.

A few more times of him catching Kyungsoo somewhere inside their campus and witnessing how the short penguin-looking guy keenly avoiding him confirmed Chanyeol’s hinala na iniiwasan nga siya nito. As far as he can remember, wala naman siyang nagawang masama to offend Kyungsoo or to cause him to act like that.

Hindi naman din niya masyadong makasama si Baekhyun outside class hours dahil may sariling group of friends ito and they both promised na nothing much should change with their relationships sa friends. Chanyeol now misses his best friend badly and it gets lonelier each day.

So Chanyeol being Chanyeol, he decided to call Kyungsoo to meet sa playground near sa jeep terminal sa lugar nila. Kyungsoo responded after a couple of hours saying na he’s going. Chanyeol smiled dahil gusto niya nang makasama ulit ang best friend niya.

It was 6PM when they met sa playground. Chanyeol was already there, nakaupo sa isang swing while waiting for Kyungsoo. When the latter arrived, agad siyang sinalubong ni Chanyeol by ruffling his hair and for the first time, hinawi ni Kyungsoo ang kamay ni Chanyeol.

“Tigil mo ‘yan,” Kyungsoo said and took a seat sa left swing. Chanyeol followed suit at umupo sa right.

“Bakit galit ka?” Chanyeol asked straightforwardly to fix matters quickly.

“Hindi ako galit.”

“Eh ba’t mo ‘ko iniiwasan?” Chanyeol’s voice turned a bit louder enough to fully grab Kyungsoo’s attention kaya napatingin ito sa kanya.

“Busy nga lang,” Kyungsoo lies. “May upcoming play kami and ayoko ng distractions.”

“So distraction ako?”

 _Oo, sobra_ , Kyungsoo wanted to say but opted not to. Chanyeol might look tough but this guy is a softie as well—medyo madaling ma-offend.

“Not really pero...” Kyungsoo huffs out of frustration. “Okay, sorry. Iniiwasan kita kasi busy nga lang buong block namin for the play. I can’t hangout with you and I thought you’d get the hint lang.”

Kyungsoo found it hard na magsinungaling ngayong kaharap niya ang taong gusto niya.

“Dapat sinabi mo na lang sa ‘kin, kahit sa text.”

“Sorry.”

“Okay, forgiven,” Chanyeol said and smiles.

“Agad?”

“Miss na kita, eh.”

Gustong sumigaw ni Kyungsoo ng putangina dahil naiiyak siya sa sakit. Bakit kailangan sabihin ni Chanyeol ‘yun when he’s trying his best to get over him already kahit he’s miserably failing at it?

Finding the easy way out of his agony, Kyungsoo changed the topic. “Kamusta na kayo ni Baekhyun?”

“We’re doing great,” Chanyeol answered, looking up and smiling. “Grabe, sarap ma-inlove.”

_Foul. Bobong Kyungsoo, maling topic din ang ipinalit._

“If you don’t mind me asking,” _Wala pala akong takas sa sakit dito eh, edi sobrahan ko na._ “Anong nagustuhan mo kay Baekhyun?”

Chanyeol looks at Kyungsoo and he saw the way Chanyeol’s eyes sparkled and reflected the happiness he was feeling at the mere mention of Baekhyun’s name.

“Ah... pa’no ba...” Chanyeol looks up again, thinking. “Ang cheesy eh.”

“Dali na. Ang arte.”

“Kasi,” Chanyeol smiles at himself. “Nasa kanya lahat ng paborito ko. Hindi ko ma-explain pero halos lahat ng bagay na gusto ko, it’s in him. Sobrang sakto niya sa taste ko, gets mo ba? Basta I know, if I had to pick a favorite human, it’s most likely him.”

It was taking everything in Kyungsoo to hold down the pain so he didn’t have much to restrain his mouth from fucking things up.

“ _Sana ako rin, favorite mo_.”

“Ha?” Chanyeol looks at him weirdly for a second, then he smiled. “Favorite rin naman kita, ah. _Favorite kitang kaibigan_.”

—

Kyungsoo and his mom were sitting at their sofa habang kumakain ng ice cream at nanonood ng TV. Suddenly, Kyungsoo spoke.

“Ma, gusto ko na talaga mag-dorm,” Kyungsoo says casually as if hindi pa nila pinag-aawayan ng mama niya ang topic ba ‘yon.

“Tumigil ka nga, Kyungs—bakit ka umiiyak?”

“Ma,” Kyungsoo sniffs. “Pagod na ‘ko.”

It’s true; pagod na siya mentally dahil sa event nila at his univ at pagod na rin siya emotionally dahil kay he-who-must-not-be-named. Nakakasabay niya pa rin kasi ‘to papasok at pauwi minsan and honestly, parang gusto na lang magpasagasa ni Kyungsoo sa jeep every time. There was definitely something that changed in their friendship and maybe this time, Chanyeol got the hint and kept his distance. 

His mom hugged him. “Saan ka naman magdo-dorm, Nak?”

“Sabi ni Jun kailangan niya ng roommate para may kahati sa magbabayad ng rent. Doon po sana.”

“Kasama mo naman pala si Jun... sige. Kailan ka lilipat?”

“As soon as possible sana, Ma,” Para mas mabasawan ang chance na makita ko siya ulit. “Busy po kasi sa school at mas lalo akong napapagod kakabyahe.”

His mom nodded and made him promise na dadalasan niya ang pagbisita sa bahay nila. Kyungsoo hugged back his mother tightly, thankful na kahit unconsciously ay makakatulong ito sa slowly but surely process niya to move on.

—

Two months passed at halos back to strangers na sina Chanyeol at Kyungsoo dahil sobrang rare na nilang magkita sa campus. Hindi rin pala text o social media si Kyungsoo kaya hashtag efas siya from Chanyeol’s messages.

Chanyeol’s birthday is in an hour and Kyungsoo has been debating with himself for a week now kung babatiin niya ba o hindi. Hindi naman na sila ganun ka-close, baka okay lang kahit ‘wag na? Pero baka ma-offend si Chanyeol, eh tinuturing niyang best friend si Kyungsoo ‘di ba?

Eh what if isang bagsakan na lang ng sama ng loob at birthday greeting para may surprise ang bati niya?

Kyungsoo typed furiously sa laptop niya.

_Tangina mo, Chanyeol Park. Happy birthday, masaya ka bang nasasaktan pa rin ako dahil sa ‘yo hanggang ngayon? Inggit na inggit ako sa inyo ni Baekhyun dahil going strong kayo at mukhang pang-forever na. Minsan gusto kong sugurin ‘yang mala-anghel mong boyfriend dahil that should’ve been me, Chanyeol, dapat ako ‘yung kasama mo lagi at katawanan mo at laging nililibre at sinasabayan gumawa ng requirements. That was me before, ba’t biglang nawala? Kasi hindi na ako yung palaging nakasunod sayo? Sabagay, Baekhyun’s there already. Okay lang. Tangina mo pa rin, though. Ang sakit. I’m rambling. Ayoko na. Chanyeol, ayoko na. I still like you and it still hurts so much. It feels like I lost my happiness kasi hindi na tayo like before. I’m sorry kasi sobrang lumalayo ako from you. I’m sorry. I miss you. Let’s be friends again, pwede ba yun? Chanyeol, Happy birthday. I miss you._

—

Nov 27, 23:57

 **Kyungsoo Do** : uy, happy birthday. hope you had a great day ngayon :)

 **Chanyeol Park** : salamat, kyungsoo! :)

**Author's Note:**

> hello ano na naman ba ‘to hindi ko rin sure basta naisip ko lang ‘to last night at para akong sinasakal ng idea unless maisulat ko ayan na nga sya!!! sorry baby ko kyungsoo nabiktima pa kita love you so muchy (puppy eyes emoji) 
> 
> anyways! thank you for reading hahaha yakap so muchy thank you for supporting me and my stories :-(( love you all!!!! thank you!!! 
> 
> daldalan tayo sa twitter @saintskies


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